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Posts Tagged ‘shared parenting’

Stopping Parental Alienation Requires Family Court Reforms

July 31st, 2010 4 comments

Parental alienation is a very serious form of widespread child abuse aided and abetted by the corrupt and abusive courts in the United States and Canada. Parental alienation is driven by the psychological problems of parents abused as kids as well as by the government and divorce industry. Courts are commonly encouraging conflict in divorcing families that leads to parental alienation and other long-running conflicts damaging children. From this, they derive income and job security.

In a very real sense, parental alienation is government-backed child abuse. When you see a judge in a black robe, if you are reminded of the grim reaper or angel of death coming to kill your family because that’s its job, you’re not far off the mark. Parental alienation will not stop unless court reforms are implemented that support shared parenting, move away from the adversarial “winner takes all” decisions common today, and put into place support systems that help parents work together for the benefit of their children without repeated conflict-inducing trips back to court.

Parental alienation is a form of emotional abuse against both children and the alienated parent, sometimes called the target parent, and often his or her entire extended family. As parental alienation expert Dr. Amy Baker has found in her research, it causes greatly elevated rates of long-term depression and substance abuse in the children who are victims. The harm does not stop when they become adults, either. A large portion of alienated children will in turn enter into emotionally abusive relationships which result in them being alienated from their own children.

(from Parental Alienation Book For Middle School Kids: “I Don’t Want to Choose!”)

Alienated children frequently are psychologically damaged in long-term ways. They often develop depression, substance abuse problems, eating disorders, and even manipulative behavior patterns similar to their alienating parents. Some compare growing up with an alienating parent as being kidnapped and brainwashed. Of her 40 research subjects covered in Adult Children of Parental Alienation Syndrome: Breaking the Ties That Bind, some notable statistics are:

  • 70% suffered from depression
  • 58% were divorced
  • Half of the 28 who had children are estranged from their own children
  • 35% developed problems with drugs and alcohol

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Breastfeeding Used As An Excuse To Keep Babies Away From Fathers

July 18th, 2010 10 comments

Nursing infants should be able to spend quality time, including overnights, with their fathers. Yet some mothers try to use nursing as an excuse to block contact between infants and their dads. Courts should be fully aware that there are plentiful means to ensure a good supply of breast milk for use by fathers caring for infants.

Robert Franklin of Fathers & Families recently penned the posting Expert: No Conflict Between Breastfeeding and Shared Parenting about an article from a breastfeeding advocate who claims fathers are trying to assert in court that breastfeeding is inappropriate behavior:

(Breastfeeding Court Letter, by Katherine A Dettwyler, Ph.D., Anthropology)

In addition, my research has been used to counter charges of child abuse and “inappropriate parenting behaviors” in many court cases, especially involving divorce and custody disputes, where fathers may accuse the mother of “inappropriate parenting by virtue of extended breastfeeding” as a strategy to gain custody of children, or may simply claim that ‘continued breastfeeding’ is not relevant to shared custody arrangements.

At this point (2005), all of the research that has been conducted on the health and cognitive consequences of different lengths of breastfeeding shows steadily increasing benefits the longer a child is breastfed up to the age of 2 years, and no negative consequences. No research has been conducted on the physical, emotional, or psychological health of children breastfed longer than 2 years. Thus, while there is no research-based proof that breastfeeding a child for 3 years provides statistically significant health or cognitive benefits compared to breastfeeding a child for only two years, there is no research to show that breastfeeding a child for 3 years (or 4-5-6-7-8-9 years) causes any sort of physical, psychological or emotional harm to the child. This has recently been confirmed in the 2005 American Academy of Pediatrics “Recommendations for breastfeeding the healthy term infant” (see below).

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California AB 2475 To Strip Immunity from Custody Evaluators

May 5th, 2010 28 comments

California Assembly Representative Jim Beall is back with another attempt to shut down destructive use of child custody evaluations. This new Assembly Bill 2475 has grown out of his failure in 2009 to pass his Assembly Bill 612 that wrongly aimed to ban discussion of parental alienation in family law courts. This time around, AB 2475 is on more solid ground as it aims to strip quasi-judicial immunity from private family court appointed experts such as psychological and custody evaluators. This would provide a legal fallback for civil suits for egregious cases of misconduct by these professionals.

Failed AB 612 from 2009

Last year, Jim Beall wanted to outlaw the discussion of parental alienation in family law cases. We and many other organizations that support shared parenting and protecting children from abuse and neglect vehemently opposed the AB 612 legislation he introduced. AB 612 was nothing but whitewashing of emotional child abuse to enable abusers to get away with hurting children and in many cases rewarding them for doing so. That bill, AB 612, was gutted by legislators who understood that parental alienation is a real phenomenon. Beall later withdrew the bill.
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Co-parenting With A Sociopath (Borderline, Narcissist, etc.)

April 2nd, 2010 108 comments

Donna Anderson wrote ”Red Flags of Love Fraud – 10 Signs You’re Dating a Sociopath” to explain how to detect if your romantic relatioship might be with a sociopath. If you didn’t realize this soon enough and had a child, she’s got some other advice for you on how to cope with the problems of trying to co-parent with such a person.

On her website, I happened across a very good posting on LoveFraud.com titled LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: Tips for co-parenting with a sociopath containing advice on how to co-parent with a sociopath. Sociopaths are people who manage to portray themselves to the general public as friendly, caring, nice people but in reality they are manipulative, deceitful, and endeavor to hurt others to get what they want. Some of the common sociopaths you are likely to find in family law courts are people who are “acting out” Borderlines, Narcissists, and Antisocials. Their morality can be summed up in one sentence: If it gets me what I want or will hurt somebody I don’t like, it’s A-OK.
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Petition to Support Equal Parenting Bill in Tennessee

April 1st, 2010 5 comments

Amanda Hutchings of South Carolina has started a petition In Support of the Tennessee House Bill 2916 to support the equal parenting time bill before the Tennessee House.

Please sign the petition if you support the idea that kids deserve significant time with both of their parents except in cases in which a parent is declared unfit by clear and convincing evidence.

We’ve previously discussed the bill in our article Tennessee House Considering Equal Parenting Bill. You can find the text of the bill there. It is very simple and anybody who truly cares about children should be able to see this is a bill that should pass.

Depriving a child of time with a parent should never be done without solid reason or agreement by the parents. This bill enshrines that ideal into law by raising the standard of evidence to that used in most civil courts in the US rather than the much weaker “preponderance of evidence” (sometimes called the 51% standard) used in many family law courts.

Even if you do not live in Tennessee, your support on this petition may help show those in other states that the time for equal parenting has come.

Tennessee House Considering Equal Parenting Bill

March 30th, 2010 10 comments

Tennessee Representative Mike Bell has submitted House Bill 2916 to change the law to provide for 50/50 equal parenting unless there is clear and convincing evidence that one or both parents are unfit to care for the children.
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John Van Doorn Runs for San Diego County Supervisor in 2010

February 24th, 2010 6 comments

John Van Doorn has announced he is running for San Diego County Supervisor in 2010. We believe he deserves strong consideration for your vote in the June 2010 primaries.

The corruption and abuse within the County of San Diego government threatens the well-being of the citizens and particularly children and parents of the county. Bill Horn, the incumbent candidate, has participated in hiding and continuing these abuses. Despite two decades of San Diego Grand Jury reports detailing how San Diego CPS has wrongly removed children from families, fabricated evidence, perjured, and acted in a malicious fashion against many parents and children, Bill Horn has not lifted a finger to correct these problems despite being a member of the County Board of Supervisors during this long era of egregious CPS misconduct.
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US Warns Japan Over Shielding Parental Child Abductors

February 3rd, 2010 1 comment

In February 2010, the United States federal government cranked up the pressure on Japan to start cooperating with resolving international parental child abduction cases involving Japanese parents taking kids back to Japan and preventing them from seeing their non-Japanese parents. Assistant Secretary of State Kurt Campbell issued a warning to Japan to revise its family law system to permit non-Japanese parents to have contact with their children.
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US Senate Candidate Scott Brown Supports Shared Parenting

January 18th, 2010 No comments

Three candidates are running to fill deceased Massachusetts politician Ted Kennedy’s position in the U.S. Senate. They are Scott Brown, Martha Coakley, and Joe Kennedy. Massachusetts citizens will be voting in this important race on January 19, 2010. We urge them to vote for Scott Brown to support the rights of children and parents to be involved in each others’ lives.

Of the three candidates, Scott Brown is the only one with a record of supporting shared parenting. He’s presently a state senator in Massachusetts who has co-sponsored shared parenting legislation.

Martha Coakley’s track record in office makes it clear she supports prosecutorial and judicial abuses against parents, particularly men and fathers. She’s an attorney general and her track record in similar offices shows she is strongly against civil rights and against correcting the unjust outcomes of wrongful prosecutions.

Joe Kennedy’s positions on such matters are unclear, perhaps in part because he’s not presently in office. But he is running as a Libertarian candidate, an advocate for smaller government, and is no relation to the Kennedy clan or Ted Kennedy’s leftist politics.
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DCF Poaching on the Tiger Woods, Elin Nordegren Kids?

December 16th, 2009 1 comment

Tiger Woods is being called a hound, woman-chaser, slut, scoundrel, disgrace to golf, adulterer, etc. There’s no end to the insults some could fling at him. Probably there will be no end to the equally slutty bimbos trying to make a buck off their stories of “bedtime with Tiger”, too.

But what does that have to do with Child Protective Services (CPS), or DCF as they call them in Florida, showing up at the Woods residence? DCF should stay out of this mess.
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