“I Want The Litigation To End” May Be A Warning You Are Being Manipulated By A Sociopath

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February 28th, 2012 Leave a comment Go to comments

There has been much mainstream media coverage of the controversy over the illegal banning of the The Psyco Ex Wife website. Many of the mainstream media writers pump up sympathy-evoking statements, particularly those coming from Allison Morelli who is the woman reputed to be the PEW (Psycho Ex Wife) character discussed on the site. As an example, I’ve seen variations of this statement reported by UPI and other publications:

Quoted from Man’s divorce blog starts free speech dispute:

Allison Morelli said she just wants the legal battle to end.

A person who has not had experience interacting with sociopaths is easily led into feeling sympathy by statements like this.

But anybody who is familiar with the workings of the mind of the devious sociopathic liars who pervade family law courts must ask, what does such a statement really mean? In my experience, statements such as “I just want the litigation to end” are warning flags. You should stop to think long and hard about what they really mean.

Healthy people certainly would have a reason for making such a statement. When they say something like this, they mean they want to stay out of court, or that they want some fair resolution to the dispute and then to be done with it and put it behind them.

But sociopaths mean something completely different. They often make such comments not for honest reasons but to manipulate you and to gain allies.

Whether Allison Morelli is a sociopath or not, I don’t profess to know. It’s often hard to tell the sociopath from the victim at first glance. I don’t have sufficient information to judge whether much of what has been written about her is true or not. But I’d like to point out that sympathy-provoking comments are certainly are not at odds with those made by actual sociopaths and that most of the mainstream media writers are completing missing this.

You can’t tell simply from a comment what a sociopathic person truly means unless you have a lot of experience dealing with that person. You have to look at the big picture spanning years to really understand what such a comment means. The big picture is something that sociopaths excel at hiding from most of the people around them. They are information control freaks and this is why they are especially threatened by people writing or talking about their behaviors in a public forum such as a website.

Here’s a short list of a few possible meanings of “I want the custody battle to end” types of statements for a sociopath:

  • I hope to bury my ex in court and will put and end to his or her [insert choice here: freedom, life, happiness, time with my children] there.
  • I want my ex to stop exposing me as a liar because it upsets me and makes it harder to gain allies to abuse him or her.
  • I plan to litigate until the end of my ex’s time on earth.
  • I won’t stop until my ex gives up on the children and is broke and homeless.
  • I want you to feel sorry for me so you will help me abuse my ex.

To have a chance of understanding what is really meant, you need to learn about the way sociopaths think.

Sociopathy Difficult to Detect Without Extensive Contextual Knowledge

When a sociopath utters “I want it to end”, sometimes you can figure out the person is likely a sociopath because she or he has filed motion after motion usually based upon false statements, distortions, intent to deprive the kids of the other parent, and often outright selfishness and greed.

Unfortunately, most people hearing that statement have zero knowledge of what has really happened and often have zero experience interacting with a sociopath intent on harming them. They may know about the long court battle, but if so they have probably heard lie after lie about it meant to manipulate them to be sympathetic. The lies may go back even years before the court battle started.

For instance, you may have heard sob stories about CPS coming over to the person’s house based upon the ex’s false allegations every week and think the ex is a horrible person. What you may not know is that it was a doctor, teacher, or other person who contacted the police or CPS because of suspicious injuries or other signs of child abuse and it was not the ex initiating these investigations, contrary to the lies.

Sociopaths Often Pretend to Be Victims

Sociopaths frequently play up their victim status, acting like they are innocent victims of the people they are in fact abusing themselves. Because most people who have not had extensive interaction with a sociopath tend to take such statements at face value, without considering the context, they fail to understand the real meaning. Many of them feel sorry for the sociopath, offer the sociopath their time, money, and even assistance abusing the sociopath’s ex. And they do this foolishly thinking they are helping a good person when in fact they may be assisting in great evil.

Sociopaths Are Manipulative Liars

Sociopaths are manipulative liars who are entirely willing to perjure themselves in court. And because perjury is seldom punished except for political reasons, sociopaths keep doing it and often get away with it.

They often lie to police and CPS, too, to build a false case to take their victims back to court for more abuse. As information control freaks, they often block access to real evidence and create false evidence. They do this by stealing records, altering documents, lying to instigate police raids on their victims, tampering with documents (removing pages, inserting pages, altering text), and more.

Some sociopaths are pathological liars, or compulsive liars. Even though they lie reflexively, these may be the less dangerous ones because often some of their lies can be disproven. They are more apt to lie about things that others can easily discover.

Others are much better at lying here and telling the truth there, all depending upon what serves their purpose of the moment or who knows what. Sometimes you can tell these sociopaths are lying if you can get them to tell their story to a few different people months or years apart. Often the details will change dramatically. Details sometimes shift based upon the audience, too.

I believe this is often because they really don’t care what the truth is. They simply want to manipulate others to feel sorry for them, pay attention to them, or to do their bidding. If it takes claiming to be a Christian to church members, that she was beaten by her ex-husband to a DV support group, or that the ex’s new boyfriend is a drug dealer to a men’s rights group, sociopaths will do it because they know how to twist the truth for effect.

Some Sociopaths Churn Through Experts

Another sign of some sociopaths is that they churn through attorneys, psychologists, and other service providers as their old ones get worn out, tired of not being paid, or disgusted with being lied to and used. It is not unusual for them to go through one or more per year. Healthy people of course may also have their reasons for changing lawyers or therapists, but they usually have to do with something practical such as a relocation, change in insurance, or reasonable dissatisfaction with services provided.

In the context of court, sociopaths often end up self-represented because they realize they can lie and perjure and cheat more cheaply that way and don’t have to put in so much effort to escape the moderating influence exerted by many lawyers.

This is not to say that all self-represented litigants are sociopaths. Instead, you should realize that even good attorneys who are well-intentioned usually have zero ability to rein in the abuse and maliciousness of a sociopath. Sociopaths hate attorneys who try to make them behave better, so eventually they find themselves without one. They even scare away or fire many of the really scummy attorneys because everybody has a limit of some sort, be it a limit upon how much lying they are willing to do for a client or how much yelling, screaming, and weird behavior they can tolerate.

Healthy people who end up self-represented or stop their therapy sessions often do this because they run out of money and have no choice. For the sociopath, that is usually not the reason. Remember, these people are expert liars and manipulators and can often get somebody else to pay the bill.

There are sociopaths who stick with the same experts year after year. That is often because their experts have been so taken in by their lies that they cannot see through them. Other times, it is because these experts are the sort who will do anything for a dollar. You could call them sociopaths, too. Either way, these sorts of experts are the kinds of people sociopaths love as they are either the “brainwashed minions” or “willing accomplices” whom they depend upon for their own nasty purposes.

Sociopathic Psychology

The most common general themes you see with sociopaths are deep seated insecurities, the driving need to control others by any means they can, and a total lack of any typical sense of morality or ethics. You should realize that sociopaths think you exist for their use and abuse and that the moral and ethical thing to do is always whatever is most advantageous for themselves.

For example, people who often borrow money but seldom pay it back are much more likely to be sociopaths than people who seldom borrow and consistently pay others back. Or they are always asking you to take care of their kids, but seldom return the favor and meantime are turning down the ex’s offer to take care of the kids.

Be Skeptical When You Hear “I Want The Litigation To End”

Perhaps one of your acquaintances, friends, or family members has been mired in a family law court for years, all the while complaining often in almost incredible sounding stories about her or his ex being a child abuser, thief, rapist, wife beater, etc.. The next time you hear this person go on this way, consider that you may actually be listening to a sociopath trying to manipulate you to gain sympathy.

Unless you know the big picture and have heard and seen extensive evidence from sources not controlled by or aligned with the person talking with you, you cannot possibly know what is going on. Even the courts cannot figure it out most of the time, at least not until they have taken part in doing great damage to the sociopath’s victims and children for many years.

Sociopaths are expert liars and manipulators and prey on gullible people to use them for selfish and wrongful purposes. Most people are nothing but “marks” to scam and manipulate to a sociopath. That includes their “friends” and coworkers and family members.

That an ex is complaining about being harassed, lied about, and harmed by the person you know doesn’t mean the ex is a liar or a bully. On the contrary, any normal healthy person will reach a breaking point where they cannot sit by and take any more abuse and will fight back. This is where the courts often get confused as they often fail to understand the big picture and especially the chronology of events. They conclude that the person who “denigrated” somebody on the Internet is a bad person, when in fact the bad person is the one who has been lying, cheating, harming, and harassing the “denigrator” for years but is now acting like some innocent victim. Often the person pretending falsely to be the victim has had a great deal of help with the harassing, including by government employees and particularly the courts, because she or he is able to dupe gullible people into funding and participating in the harassment. So she or he can say “I didn’t do it” when in fact she or he was behind all of the abuse.

The number one thing to remember is that all may not be as it seems. Number two is that just because somebody is angry doesn’t mean they are wrong. Sociopaths often attack and aggravate a target just to get them to react badly so they can then point and say “see, I told you he or she was bad!”

When a sociopath lies to kick the ex out of his or her home, take the children, force him or her to supervised visitation or no contact, and then repeats the same sort of attacks multiple times over multiple years, you cannot possibly expect anybody, not even a saint, to stand by and not complain loudly about this. But if you don’t know the full picture, you may mistakenly think the person who appears to be a target of nasty complaints is a wonderful person and the ex is simply being horribly nasty. Sociopaths will use all the tricks in their playbook to make you think this way because it is the first step in gaining your support. To a sociopath, you are a fool to be manipulated and used to support the abuse of the ex, the ex-in-laws, or whomever else the target may be.

Detecting A Sociopath

One of the few things you can safely do to judge whether you are dealing with a sociopath without being sucked into harming another person is to discuss very basic fundamental issues. For instance, talk about how children have a right to spend time with both their parents and isn’t it bad that so many cannot. Discuss how free speech is important, even when it may appear mean, so long as it is honest.

Often if you attempt to take such positions with sociopaths, they will stop talking with you. They may realize you are more skeptical than most. Also, these people have trouble seeing greys. They view the world in black and white. “You’re either under my control and believe what I want you to believe or I hate you and you are to be avoided or harmed” is typical thinking for them.

A litmus test that may work with many sociopaths is to take the stand that kids should have 50% time with each parent absent some extreme circumstances such as a criminal conviction for something dangerous to a kid. If the the person agrees, the odds are much higher that you are not dealing with a sociopath. If the person disagrees or gives all sorts of reasons why the ex should be convicted of some crime but has not even after years of this conflict, then you are probably dealing with a sociopath.

A healthy person can usually accept that a parent can be nasty to the ex but the kids will still love the parent and should still be able to spend significant time with both parents. But a sociopath won’t truly care about the kids except to mouth concern as a means to manipulate others. Unfortunately, it is often hard to tell the difference because sociopaths are good at looking like normal people except when they are alone with the target or under a lot of stress and their true nature breaks through.

Sociopaths want it all. They are not willing to share unless they can get something more valuable to them in exchange. A few will gladly let the kids see the ex if the ex is willing to fork over thousands of dollars or sign over title to the house to them in exchange. But most would rather have the kids, the house, and the money. They view the kids as a means to get all they want simply by lying and manipulating enough people. Since they are good at that, they rightly view their odds of success as being high.

Another frequently good test is to view how the people treat their kids. Lazy sociopaths who get sole custody or nearly so often spend a lot of time ignoring their kids or farming them out to childcare providers. They want the kids to love them and hate the ex, but are not willing to put much effort into it.

Sociopaths Are Hard To Detect, So Try To Avoid Involvement In Conflicts You Don’t Understand

Sociopaths treat relatively few people as targets, mostly former loved ones or former friends. That’s part of why it is so hard for most people to understand they are dealing with a sociopath. They may think something like “she didn’t treat me badly, she is always acting interested in me and complimenting me so the ex must be a bad person.” That’s exactly what a sociopath wants you to think and exactly why their most abusive and horrible behaviors are often very well hidden from view by most people.

You may be curious about what is going on, but realize that unless you are willing to take the step of getting information from the other party and read court files, examine evidence, and so forth even beyond what a court is willing to do, you run a very high chance of misunderstanding what is happening.

Ask yourself, do you want to be responsible for helping to abuse an innocent parent and damage children via severe emotional abuse? The sociopath knows that their marks would say no. That is why they spend so much time talking in distortions, lies, and misleading statements and showing people false “evidence” to control others to get what they want. Very often, sympathy-evoking phrases such as “I just want the court battle to end” are what they use to manipulate you at an emotional level.

When you try to help a high conflict parent in a family law dispute by any means, you are running around a 50% risk that you are helping a sociopath harm his or her victims unless you have solid independent information to help you improve the odds. You run the very real risk of being turned into an abuser yourself. If you don’t like those odds, and you shouldn’t, then your best bet is to stay out of the situation.

More On The Psycho Ex Wife Controversy

Judge Diane E. Gibbons Confirms Herself An Enemy of Free Speech and Supporter of Abuse By Silencing The Psycho Ex Wife Website

Judge Diane E. Gibbons Orders ThePsychoExWife.com Shut Down: What Would You Do?

More On Sociopathic Abuse in Family Law Disputes

Sociopaths In Our Midst Hate the Truth and Its Advocates

Telling Your Nasty Ex About BPD or NPD May Hurt You

How Sociopathic Parents Use Police Reports for Defamation

Escaping Sociopathic Abuse Almost Impossible When Children Are Involved

Personality Disordered Abusers in Family Law Courts

Personality Disordered Abusers in Psychological Evaluations

  1. SD parent 22
    February 28th, 2012 at 18:14 | #1

    Rob–I’m so sorry you or somebody has had to deal with this. Damn.

    I’m not sure how to resolve these issues, but I’ve learned, after many failures, that putting trust in most women is not a good idea. They can be assasins. Maybe we gotta get better goggles or something.

    Only thing I’ve figured out is time. Watch how they react to adversity. Hell we all got it. If she sticks through it no matter what with ya, keeper. If she turns, well…

    Good luck brother.

    Best always.

    • February 28th, 2012 at 21:36 | #2

      SD parent 22,

      Thanks for your sympathies, all of us who have been tormented by sociopaths could use some better understanding from the general public when it comes to what it is like to be tortured by these nasty people.

      Your comment about how people act during adversity is quite true in my experience. Adversity tends to bring out bizarre, destructive, and dishonest behaviors in Borderlines and other sociopaths, probably because of their deep insecurities. They can often hide these behavior tendencies when everything is going OK. But when it’s not, the lies and attacks start up.

      The problem is much bigger and more general than family law cases. And the adversity does not even have to be much of anything to trigger these people into hostilities.

      For instance, in a work situation you may see a Borderline be challenged as to her idea for some project or task by another person. It’s not uncommon for these sorts of people to then resort to false allegations of sexual harassment, gender discrimination, workplace misconduct, or some other lie to attack the person who has differing opinions. Often there is some small bit of truth to the attack, for instance the supervisor told the female employee her new red dress looked great. Then later when he says her idea for which she expected to be rewarded won’t work and would cost the company millions due to something she hadn’t considered, she can take that comment he made and add a bunch of lies and distortions to paint him as a sexual harasser who spends a lot of time talking with her about her looks. And she’s particularly likely to do that if a couple of other people in the office heard the comment, too. This just adds to the false impressions of her malicious lies having some validity. That the supervisor also told a male employee on some other occasion that his new shirt looked great is of course conveniently not mentioned, as is the fact that he also pointed out flaws in other ideas from other employees.

      There is really no way to be safe when interacting with a sociopath as they can even distort the facts that other people know to be true by using the kernels of small nonproblematic truths to grows giant trees of lies. The best thing to do is to avoid these people entirely. In a work situation, you can do that by changing jobs. But it is simply not possible to do that when you had kids with a sociopath unless you abandon the kids to a miserable life with the sociopath. And I do mean miserable. Sociopaths manipulate, attack, and use their own children just like they do to others.

      Rob

  2. Joesixpack
    March 2nd, 2012 at 12:56 | #3

    Very good piece, but I think you make a couple of mistakes that should be pointed out.

    First though, let me say that your advice is spot on. Sociopaths are very dangerous people to have to deal with in and out of the court system.

    The first issue I have with your article is that sociopaths are not pathological liars. Pathological liars can’t help but lie, even when they know that they’ll be found out. Pathological lying is characterized by the fact that there is almost never any gain expected from the lie.

    Sociopaths, on the other hand, are accomplished liars. Their lies are strictly utilitarian and much more calculated. They may be habitual liars, but their lies are more aimed at controlling those around them and are usually part of more long term goals.

    Pathological liars are troublesome and often a nuisance, but sociopaths are always dangerous.

    My second issue with the article is your presentation of sociopaths churning through experts. While this is generally true of people with cluster “B” personality disorders, it is not universally true of sociopaths. Though all cluster ‘B’s exhibit, to some degree or another, sociopathic behavior, they are not all sociopaths. Many sociopaths are skillful enough at lying and manipulation that they are completely capable of stringing their lawyers along indefinitely, (we usually send them to Washington DC, or let them run major corporations).

    Sorry to sound critical. I liked the article quite a bit. It certainly applies to dealings with both true sociopaths and with cluster ‘B’ personality types.

    • March 9th, 2012 at 00:42 | #4

      Joesixpack,

      Thanks for the remarks.

      I agree with you that a lot of sociopaths are fully aware of their lying, at least some of the time. I found a good explanation of another author’s version of the difference between sociopaths and compulsive liars (aka pathological liars) at What is the Difference Between a Sociopath, a Compulsive, a Pathological, a Chronic, and a Habitual Liar?:

      For the most part, compulsive liars are not overly manipulative and cunning (unlike sociopaths), rather they simply lie out of habit – an automatic response which is hard to break and one that takes its toll on a relationship (see, how to cope with a compulsive liar).

      In my opinion, it’s often very hard to differentiate between the two unless you spend a lot of time with them. I think truly compulsive liars are more rare than sociopaths. And I’d agree with you that sociopaths are more dangerous than truly compulsive liars because it is often easier to detect the truly compulsive liar’s lies.

      However, there are some sociopaths who lie even when there is no apparent advantage to it. Sometimes they seem to actually believe these lies, even though they are easily disproven. So I think that there is an overlap between the two groups, meaning there are some sociopaths who are also compulsive liars.

      Regarding sociopaths churning through experts, you’re right that not all of them do that. Just like Borderlines generally do not exhibit all nine criteria describe in DSM-IV, not all of them (or any other person with a personality disorder or sociopathic behavior) will churn through experts, either. I find that the “acting in” Borderlines often do not churn experts and are more likely to recognize they have a problem and want help. The “acting out” ones behave much more like sociopaths and some of them churn experts, especially if they were ordered to consult such experts or they realize their lying has been detected.

      I’ll update my article to reflect your constructive observations.

      Rob

  3. Borderline Target
    March 9th, 2012 at 21:39 | #5

    Good article. There are so many phrases these abusive manipulators use that are tip-offs they are not right in the head. “My children” instead of “our children.” Referring to themselves as “sole custodian” instead of mother or father. Must be more. Would love to see an article on detecting sociopaths via their word choices.

    • March 10th, 2012 at 00:14 | #6

      Borderline Target,

      The “sole custody” and “primary custody” phrases are ones that these people love to use. They seem to think it somehows “proves” that the parent they are alienating the children against is inferior and the courts have certified that.

      To the naive, it can be convincing. To anybody who knows what the family law courts are like or understands the mind of a sociopath or personality disordered abuser, such talk makes you instantly wonder if the kids are now spending most of their time with a child abuser thanks to some biased or incompetent judge.

      Rob

  4. SD parent 22
    March 10th, 2012 at 00:35 | #7

    Agreed Joe. Stay strong brother.

    The jungle is full of evil.

    My Best.

  5. Been there, done that
    March 13th, 2012 at 17:52 | #8

    “The “sole custody” and “primary custody” phrases are ones that these people love to use. They seem to think it somehows “proves” that the parent they are alienating the children against is inferior and the courts have certified that.

    To the naive, it can be convincing. To anybody who knows what the family law courts are like or understands the mind of a sociopath or personality disordered abuser, such talk makes you instantly wonder if the kids are now spending most of their time with a child abuser thanks to some biased or incompetent judge.”

    This is so true, especially in the Allison Morelli case. She is currently going around the Internet telling everyone she won custody, and of course threatening and bullying people, yet Anthony Morelli didn’t feel the need to do that when he won the last custody case. He just wanted to enjoy his children, and did for 4 years, while Allison continued to file in court, all while she was blacking out drunk in front of her 8 and 10 year old. Now she believes even more, thanks to Diane Gibbons, that she has “never done anything wrong” and it was all Anthony. She is telling everyone and anyone, and the kids I’m sure, are disgusted because they lived through it all, and now are stuck with her.

    And if you read Allison Morelli’s Twitter account, she is continuing to gear up for more lawsuits she wants to file.

    But you know, she just “wanted the litigation to end.”

  6. Curious
    March 13th, 2012 at 18:36 | #9

    Oooh, would love to see what trash she is writing now. Could you give us a link to Allison Morelli’s Twitter page?

  7. Ex ToChiro
    April 6th, 2012 at 01:32 | #10

    Wow . .. .this is a great article. I guess one should take comfort in knowing they aren’t the only ones whose lives are devastated by these sociopaths. However, it is sad that there are so many of them. Yes, my ex-husband lied to his attorneys (he went through four attorneys in four months), the court, me (of course), our children and when the the subpoenas revealed the truth, he just paid the $50,000 sanction and went on to lie again.

    He breached his fiduciary responsibility for over SEVEN years which means I lost thousands of dollars that he spent on three homes, property, cars, and his new girlfriend.

    And despite his high six figure income; he pays me less than 10% of his income because being self-employed he is able to “write off” houses (as offices), 600 acres of property (as an educational facility), month long vacations (as teaching seminars), etc.

    He can afford an arsenal of accountants and lawyers who advise him how to hide and protect “his” assets, which is “our” money. When we were first married we had no money and no children. Yet now, over twenty years later, he refers to “his” money and “his” children.

    The family court does not, yet, understand the emotional and mental devastation the sociopath places upon the ex-spouse and the children. It is not an even playing field when he has all the money and time to delay, frustrate, threaten, manipulate and buy his way out of what should be and equitable distribution.

    These articles have been more helpful than therapy – thank you!

  8. TC
    May 8th, 2012 at 17:03 | #11

    @Curious She’s had a few accounts. This is one of her recent ones: https://twitter.com/#!/allow2011

  9. The Shadow
    May 9th, 2012 at 19:32 | #12

    Curious :Oooh, would love to see what trash she is writing now. Could you give us a link to Allison Morelli’s Twitter page?

    She changes it frequently, but she’s found additional targets and is using @allow2011

    And watch her claim that she’s not a foul-mouthed, distasteful bully who does to others exactly what she claimed was allegedly done to her.

  10. Liz
    June 13th, 2012 at 14:48 | #13

    Hello and glad you are here,
    I am currently involved with a sociopath in court right now. It took me 3-years of a chaotic marriage and 9-months of divorcing him to put all the fragmented and shattered pieces together and see through the black clouds: Sociopath.

    I only even knew to research Sociopath because a friend hearing my story sent me a link to “10 warning signs of a Sociopath.” I am just now learning about Sociopaths and spent most of my life oblivious to the fact that someone can exist without a conscience.

    I have been looking for free counseling or group support in the SD area (he left me broke and almost homeless after I gave him all my savings and earning) but come up empty. I have called Lifeline…and many others and no one can point me in the right direction.

    Help,
    Liz

  11. June 14th, 2012 at 22:10 | #14

    @Liz

    I’m not sure this group is exactly right, but they may be able to point you in a helpful direction. TARA San Diego runs support groups for families affected by Borderline Personality Disorder. While BPD is a specific condition that is not exactly the same as the general term “sociopath”, many of the behaviors you see in sociopaths overlap with “acting out” Borderlines who show strong intent and ability to harm harm other people as the means to feel more secure and in control of their lives.

    The general TARA website is as http://www.tara4bpd.org/ .

    I found this information for their San Diego chapter:

    TARA San Diego, California
    Monthly Support Meetings in several locations
    10-Week Family Education Workshop
    - Small Class – Call to register ASAP
    760-729-5748 or 760-518-7022
    [email protected]

    Another group of people who behaviors as sociopaths are those with NPD (Narcissitic Personality Disorder). I found these NPD support groups in the San Diego area:

    Survivors of Narcissistic Wounding

    The San Diego Narcissistic Relationships Support Group

    For people outside the San Diego area, here’s a longer list of support groups for those suffering the fallout of a relationship with a sociopath, Narcissist, or similar:

    I hope this helps you.

    Rob

  12. July 22nd, 2012 at 15:26 | #15

    Four American children living in Florence, Italy with their custodial father were abducted by their non-custodial mother, who had lost custody one year before when she was found to be psychologically unfit to be a parent.

    In Italy, mothers lose custody in less than 2% of all divorces. Only in extreme cases do they take children away from mothers.

    The children’s physical and psychological health is at risk. They are being isolated from their family and friends. Their mother does not allow them any communication with the outside world. They do not attend school regularly.

    The children were abandoned into Russian Institutions/Orphanages when their mother was unable to care for them.

    Petition to Secretary Hillary Clinton to intervene to help bring the children home:

    http://www.thepetitionsite.com/takeaction/848/883/039/

  13. May 15th, 2014 at 14:08 | #16

    I am in the middle of this right now. The problem is the third party who believes the BP or NP person is usually a GAL or custody evaluator. I have lost a little time with my kids, and been accused of not being attentive, forcing the kids to work like slaves and babysit, and abandoning one kid. All the while she has blocked access to the one son. The GAL was ready to order supervised visits. When I told my kids that the schedule was changing, they weren’t happy. She talks bad about me around them constantly. Screams at them when they aren’t doing their part to hold up their image for her. She forces them to spend most of their weekend time with their sexually and physically abusive older brother on home therapy visits from the group home he lives in. I hope that because the judge isn’t entering permanent orders, she is observing what is going on, and will make some better conclusions. The GAL already saw a somewhat different picture sitting in the jury box while we were in court. She perjured herself at least twice, and her lawyer corrected the record to protect her in both cases. I just don’t know if the judge is getting that this is all about punishing me for moving on after she ended the marriage. Now she is mucking with the holiday schedule to make things more difficult.

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