Posts Tagged ‘It’s Not Your Fault Koko Bear’

Divorce Books for Kids

August 27th, 2010 7 comments

(Originally published January 15, 2009. Updated August 27, 2010.)

So you’re getting a divorce, or have already gotten one. Have any kids in the picture? You can bet they are confused about what you and your ex-spouse (or soon-to-be-ex-spouse) have done by breaking up the family. Kids need to understand what is going on from such a big family change as a divorce, and it’s not a simple thing for them. Why? Well, for starters:

  • Children often blame themselves for the divorce.

  • They need to know that divorce is an adult problem, not one caused by children.

  • Child self-blame for divorce creates psychological problems, some of which can be long-term and severe.

  • Children need to know that it’s OK to love both parents.

  • They are often put in the middle and made to “pick sides” by one or both parents and don’t like this at all.

  • They need to know that parents who try to make them “pick sides” and bad-mouth the other parent are doing the wrong thing so they won’t participate and may possibly help their misguided parent(s) control themselves.

Even in an amicable divorce involving children, there are going to be questions and worries. All of the books discussed in this posting can help with those, especially for the intended audience which is generally late toddler-hood to early grade school, about ages 2 to 9.

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