In the back of my mind, I think of myself as a “real feminist”. I support equal opportunity for women, equal pay for equal work, and the rights of women to vote, be free from discrimination based upon their gender, and to enjoy self-determination of their lives. Unfortunately, the feminist movement of mainstream culture was subverted years ago by people who are not aiming for gender equality but instead seek superiority for women over men by any means they can. This presents a dilemma for people like me who genuinely want women and men to enjoy the same rights and responsibilities.
I’m a father, and I have daughters. How could I want anything less than equal opportunities and equal protection under the law for my daughters? Most fathers my age whom I know think similarly. Maybe men twenty or more years ago were not as egalitarian-minded, and even today in Muslim nations there is extensive inequality for women. But nearly all of the men I know today living in Western nations and sophisticated developing nations such as China are used to working with women and reporting to female supervisors. We’ve supported our female partner’s careers and educational goals. We love our children, both our sons and daughters, and want them to have the opportunities the deserve to have good and fulfulling lives pursuing their lives how they want to do so, whether that means as doctors, engineers, lawyers, scientists, librarians, soldiers, business managers, or stay-at-home parents if that’s what they chose.
So I can’t help but wonder what’s up with the “feminists” we have today who rail against males because of their gender? After much reading and consideration, I’ve come to the conclusion that these people are false feminists. They are sexist and self-absorbed, failing to recognize that sexism is bad no matter who is on the receiving end of the discrimination. They back sexually discriminatory laws such as the Violence Against Women Act  (biased starting from the name onwards!), sexually discriminatory and unconstitutional policies such as stripping men of their rights with no opportunity for defense nearly any time a woman makes an unsubstantiated claim of abuse, and unequal child custody allocations consistently depriving children of time with fathers and their paternal extended families. Apparently these false feminists have forgotten the real motivation of the early feminists was for equal treatment under the law, not for government-backed discrimination against males.
False feminists also perpetuate their propaganda that men are violent and abusive, failing to recognize the growing volume of modern research and anecdotal examples that show that violence is a problem regardless of gender and that women can just as abusive and murderous as men. Some examples of the reality that they try to hide include:
Mothers More Likely to Abuse Children than Fathers  cites a study done by a University of British Columbia professor who finds that physical violence directed towards children is more likely to be perpetrated by mothers than fathers.
A study of 1100 lesbian and bisexual couples showed the women are more likely to encounter violence in their relationships with females than those with males. Read more about it in Lesbian relationships more violent than heterosexual relationships .
A Harvard Medical School study found that in relationships with partner violence, about half is mutual with both partners committing violence against each other. Of the remainder, more than 70% of the single-partner violence is committed by females. Read more about it in Women commit more than 70% of single-partner DV .
An international study of domestic partner violence conducted by the University of New Hampshire and financially supported by the US National Institute of Mental Health  found that most violent relationships involve violence by both male and female partners. Of the rest, more feature violence committed by females only than by males only. A common thread of violence in relationships is one partner being extremely dominant. The correlation between female-dominated relationships and female-perpetrated violence appears to indicate females who are domineering often use violence to maintain control of their relationships. Read more about it at Female Violence Against Males .
Professor Martin S. Fiebert’s bibliography of research  showing that females abuse and murder their spouses and male partners includes 246 investigations encompassing nearly 250,000 people. The conclusions clearly show female-perpetrated violence is a very common feature of relationships.
Erin Pizzey is a female domestic violence activist who has encountered many abusive and aggressive women who terrorize their families. Read more about her thoughts in The Family Terrorist  and the links it contains.
Susan Smith  was convicted of the double-homicide of her two sons ages 1 and 3.
Andrea Yates  killed all 5 of her children by drowning them in a bathtub.
Clarnell Strandberg Kemper and her daughters so severely abused her son Edmund Kemper  that he became a serial killer. She paid for it with her life when he killed her.
Do these studies and examples show that all women are abusive and homicidal? No, they certainly do not, no more than old and poorly designed studies prove that all men are abusers and only women are victims of partner violence. But they do clearly show that commission of abuse and violence is not the sole domain of males.
It’s really sad to see how many false feminists are so sexist and self-absorbed that they perpetuate damage that will harm generations to come. How can any mother of a boy today back the gender-biased discrimination and vilification against fathers? They are setting up their sons for similar horrible lives. I can’t help but wonder if perhaps the false feminists by and large don’t have children of their own.
Children benefit from extensive involvement in their lives from both their parents and their parents’ extended families. Too often this is not happening because of unjust and discriminatory attitudes that are widespread in supposedly democratic nations.
We in such nations deride many Muslim nations for unjust treatment of women, blocking them from access to their children and stoning them to death just on allegations of infidelity even with no proof. Yet the false feminists who make such criticisms are hypocrites as they don’t truly believe in equal justice for all.
Western nations deserve similar derision for their unjust treatment of men in the context of their families. Iin the US, UK, Canada, Australia, and many other “Western democracies” the governments are frequently depriving children of contact with their fathers on the basis of nothing more than false allegations with no proof. They do this through such abominations of justice as the “temporary restraining order” that is widely used by women to abuse and harass their ex-spouses and gain de facto child custody. It is true that some men similarly use such orders wrongly. But frankly they are learning this behavior from the female abusers who “innovated” this strategy and the courts that fail to punish perjury, false allegations, and contempt of court and thereby encourage widespread illegal behaviors that are highly detrimental to children.
The anti-male rhetoric and laws in the US are so reprehensible and disgusting that I’m really glad that I have daughters. It would almost be a moral crime to have sons in the United States today. Certainly responsible parents should be advocating changes in the laws in the US to be gender-neutral or else they are by their inaction setting up their sons and grandsons to have their lives wrongly ruined by gender-biased courts and laws as many other males have experienced in recent years.
I have hope that someday this may change. This is partly because, believe it or not, there are still “real feminists” out there besides me. Some of them are even women! One of my favorites is Wendy McElroy . Besides being an author and commentator, she maintains a couple of blog sites at WendyMcElroy.com – A site for individualist feminism and individualist anarchism  and ifeminists.com — explore the new feminism  that often have mind-expanding content. I’m glad she’s willing to challenge the false feminists and their propaganda and hope that over time her brand of feminism will become more widespread.